One of the biggest themes I hear in poly is that it’s great because you don’t have to rely on one person to meet all of your personal needs. Whether those needs are mental stimulation, companionship, romance, sex and connection. While it’s true that it’s impossible for one person to meet your needs, it’s also not the solution to simply add more people.Read more "The Truth About Emotional Work"
Why I said no to playing with you at a kink party, and why it is totally OK for me to say no.Read more "The Top 5 Reasons I Said No to Playing with You"
I’m a bdsm minimalist. How do you apply the principles of minimalism to BDSMRead more "I’m a BDSM Minimalist"
Two years ago I wrote an article called safewords are not enough. I stood by my feelings about why safewords shouldn’t be the end all be all of BDSM. Two years later I still feel the same. Many play partners and sessions later, I still don’t use safewords.Read more "Why I Still Don’t Use Safewords"
a solo poly person has their core self that consumes the majority of their resources and have satellite relationships around that core.Read more "Setting Your Boundaries as a Solo Poly Practicer"
Over seven days of recovery. One week of negotiation. Three years of an established play relationship. Around seventeen needles. One video of a partner I haven’t seen in three months insulting my life’s work. Thirty or more people watching me sob into my own lap, tied to a chair with blood trickling down my arms and […]Read more "The Numbers of Emotional Sadomasochism"
Nothing good comes from having something to prove when your tool to prove it is someone else’s body.Read more "Safewords Are Not Enough"