The holidays are coming up fast, and buying the perfect gift for your kinky friends and partners can be difficult. Here is a quick curated list of gifts that if you order priority shipping, you can still get before the holidays (or don’t require shipping at all).
Heavy Reading – Books
One of the few times I recommend buying anything from Amazon – books! Lightning fast shipping or ebooks are trustworthy (remember when Amazon was only for books?). I keep a running list of books I recommend for people who are interested in kink and polyamory and don’t know where to start. While this is nowhere near the complete list, it contains some of my all-time favorites.
The book that started it all. The Ethical Slut is a groundbreaking book about alternative relationships. It was one of the first books I read when I started to realize that I didn’t love like other people, and there had to be more people out there like me. While I don’t think it’s perfect nor do I follow all the principles in the book, it’s a great start to the philosophies behind having multiple partners.
More Than Two is a practical guide of how to poly, with funny anecdotes and real life stories. When considering opening up an existing relationship, the book provides a good overview of what to expect when you’re expecting…more people.
This books is artfully written, well researched, and probably my absolute top pick for anyone who has ever experienced a human relationship. The book has side-stitch laugh-worthy moments and fascinating glimpses into why humans are the way we are, including why our relationships are so complicated. The book is based off of exhaustive research and thoughtful theories, and helps get a glimpse into how we can approach loving each other as the strange naked monkey in the middle.
The New Topping / New Bottoming Book
This pair of books is a great way to start understanding D/s and other topping/bottoming dynamics. How do D/s relationships work? How can you be a good partner and communicate your needs? I recommend that everyone, despite their preference (top or bottom) read both books.
Tantus Dildos
Tantus has their shipping policies clearly laid out on their website. If you choose overnight shipping you can wait until the 21st to order your toys. Tantus dildos are my main recommendation for a trusty, well crafted dildo. The quality of their toys is hard to beat, and the body safe silicone is easy to clean. I especially like to use their toys with harnesses, and they champion inclusivity in their brand.
The Feeldoe is my favorite toy for “strap-on” play because you don’t have to strap it on. The feeling is probably the closest I’ve ever got to feeling like I actually have a penis. Sooo good, multiple heart eyes. I love this toy.
Courses – Learn Something New
ESINEM – Shibari Classes Online
E-Courses are becoming a great way to learn new skills, kink included. If you live somewhere that doesn’t have an active rope scene where you can learn, you still have options available to you. ESINEM is one of the main suppliers of quality bondage rope and although I personally haven’t used his classes, I’m sure they are of equal quality to his rope.
Midori – Fortefemme – Workshop
It is my dream to attend one of Midori’s workshops. Attendance would be a magical gift for a special someone. Midori is a thought leader, and one of the most dazzling instructors I’ve ever watched. Everything she does just oozes confidence and pure, sexy magic. Getting a chance to learn from her should be high on any rope-lovers to do list.
BDSM Conferences
Another great last minute gift idea is buying tickets for you and your partner to a BDSM conference. While there are hundreds of these all over the worlds and I couldn’t possibly suggest just one, a quick google search can deliver some promising events. Big events like Thunder in the Mountains happen once a year and are a great way to learn a lot fast. There will be classes during the day, and usually multiple classes at each time slot. The evenings are for indulgent play parties and socializing.
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Hey there, great article.
Did you have a chance to try out ESINEM? We started writing (and learning) about bondage ourselves and it sounds like something we could try.
Luka